A Tribute To A Surfer
The Bob Hayes Story
I first met Bob Hayes during a time in my life when I wasn't exactly auditioning
for any new friends. I was basically keeping to myself in those days. I was
single, working at a newspaper, and just surfing my way through life. I had
seen him out in the water along with hundreds of other surfers. He just blended
in with everyone else. Bob was just another surfer to me. Nothing more.
Hampton Surfers are for the most part a mixed lot. There is no real stereo type
surfer "dude", like there is in, say other parts of the world. In
New England, and particularly in New Hampshire, surfers are made up of many
different types.
Carpenters, doctors, bankers, artists, restaurant owners, just to name a few.
It seems that almost every kind of business has a surfer working there.
Bob was apparently a very successful salesman who happened to love surfing.
I just didn't know him that well until the last few years.
Bob and I were not best friends. But, we were by the end of this summer what
I would consider Friends. I had gotten to know more about Bob during the making
of my first Surf video in 1998. In fact, Bob was the very first person to ever
buy one of my videos. I remember that call.
"Hi this is Bob Hayes." Yes Bob what can I do for you?
"Well, I'd like to buy one of your surf videos." Really? You
want to buy one? "Yes". Why? "I heard it's
great." he answered laughing. But I don't even think you're in it.
I tried to explain to him. Laughing again, he said, "I don't care
if I'm in it. I heard it's good. Besides it's Hampton."
For the record, months before Bob called I had thrown up a new website (SurfFreeOrDie.com)
and posted the information about my local Surf Videos. No one called. No one
bought anything off the site. Bob was the first person to ever buy one. It was
the start of our friendship.
I remember feeling guilty about not having said more to him before he called
me that day. We had been cordial to each other in the water over the years.
But nothing more. Bob was just another friendly surfer. I'd think back and remember
my friend Jack Keefe saying how nice of a guy Bob was. And he was. Always smiling.
I just never bothered to get to know him until he called and bought that video.
We exchanged email addresses and Bob would send messages to me from time to
time. Telling me how good my videos were. He ended up buying all three of my
releases. He'd let me know how great it was that I was doing this Fund Raiser
for The American Diabetes Association and using surfing as a way to do it. He
was always giving me praise. Always. The more he praised me, the more I felt
guilty of not getting to know him better earlier in life.
I did in time, get to know more about him. During my yearlong undertaking of
Catching a Wave a Day for a Year in memory of my father, he would from time
to time show up at the Wall at 10th street and we would talk.
His own father had passed away a few years earlier. It was another bond between
us. He was married for 8 years to his wife Debbie. He had a young son named
Robbie and Debbie was pregnant with their second child. I remember one conversation
we had about how absolutely wonderful it is to have more than one child. I told
him that I had friends who had recently adopted a child and they couldn't wait
to adopt another. He would smile at the thought of having another child. He
was genuine in his love for his family. Bob's smile was infectious. I think
back now and remember all the times I ran into him over the years. And you know
what? He was always smiling. Always.
One day last spring at the Wall he was there with his 4 year old son Robbie.
My friend Jack, myself and my son Max had just gotten out of the water after
surfing. As we all stood there talking, little Robbie started throwing rocks
at us. The three of us dodging rocks from little Robbie. When I looked up there
was Bob, smiling from ear to ear. I don't know of any kid who's ever been to
the Wall that hasn't thrown rocks. Kids throw rocks at the Wall. We all laughed.
Bob had great news this day, his wife had given birth to a new son, Ryan.
It was that day, that Bob and I had our deepest conversation. We talked about
the joy and love of raising a family and introducing them to the ocean. He had
just witnessed my son Max surf with me and he could not wait until he would
do the same with his kids. This needs repeating.
Bob could not wait until he surfed with his own children. The smile on
Bob's face that day will stay with me forever. He was smiling at the image of
he and his sons surfing together. It was a tender moment. I remember feeling
so good for him that day. Nodding and winking at what was to come. The future.
Tuesday, September 11, 2001. Bob Hayes was one of the passengers aboard American
Airlines Flight 11 out of Logan. He was flying to LA for a 3 day business trip.
The irony of that morning was, sitting right off the coast was the first Hurricane
of the season, Erin. We had perfect waves pouring onto our beaches under beautiful
sunny skies. There's no doubt in my mind, that Bob would have been surfing with
the rest of us, if not for his work commitment.
I'd like to think, that when Bob realized what was about to happen on that ill
fated flight out of Boston last week, he simply closed his eyes and dreamed
of his beautiful wife Debbie and their two beautiful children.
I prayed that by the time that plane slammed into the North Tower of The World
Trade Center, Bob was far away. Oh, his body may have been there, but Bob was
back home at the beach. His wife Debbie playing with young Ryan in the sand,
while he and Robbie paddled out on their surfboards for one more wave.
Maybe his dream had come true.
And, if he was dreaming of his family, I'd bet anything, that when that final
moment came,
Bob...had the biggest smile on his face.
The next time you walk by the Wall at North Beach and look out at all the surfers.
You now know, there will be
one less surfer,
one less husband,
one less father.
And one less smile.
Ralph G. Fatello